When I Grow Up To Be A Man

Mitchell has a thought stuck in his head that he often brings up and wants reassurance about.  He is concerned about becoming a man.  It began with, "Mom, will I be a man?"  I assured him that he was, thinking he was excited about the idea, but his next question suprised me - "Do I have to be a man?"  Over the last week or so, he has been loaded with questions about "being a man" and he's just not sure it sounds like what he wants to be.  Some more of his questions have been "Why do I have to be a man?" and "What is a man?" I clearly have not made it sound like a good idea - this turning into a man business because after these sorts of questions, he makes statements such as "I don't want to be a man" and "I don't want to be a man, I just want to be Mitchell."  

I have been unable to figure out what his thinking is on this whole issue and what he actually thinks "being a man" means until he finally asked this question: "Can I turn into Mitchell again later?"  Ahhh...I think he believes that a "man" is something he will magically turn into, completely changing into something else like a dog or an ogre or a dinosaur.  Now that I have an idea where his apprehension is coming from, I can figure out better answers to his questions and more effective ways of painting a more positive picture for him.  

Because of all this "man" talk (he is talking to me about this instead of Matt because he has been out of town during this), I have had a song running through my head quite a bit.  I even sing it to the boys and while they only understand a little of the lyrics, they love it anyways because of the title and chorus:

When I grow up to be a man

Will I dig the same things that turned me on as a kid?

Will I look back and say that I wish I hadn't done what I did?

Will I joke around and still dig those sounds

When I grow up to be a man?

Will I look for the same things in a woman that I dig in a girl?

Will I settle down fast or will I first want to travel the world?

Now I'm young and free, but how will it be

When I grow up to be a man?

Will my kids be proud or think their old man is really a square?

When they're out having fun yeah, will I still want to have my share?

Will I love my wife the rest of my life

When I grow up to be a man?

What will I be when I grow up to be a man?

Won't last forever.

It's kind of sad

Won't last forever

It's kind of sad

Won't last forever.

-Beach Boys, "When I Grow Up (To Be A Man)"

Oh, Mitchell, you have so much ahead of you!  Most of this song doesn't yet apply to you, but it will!  You will grow into a man, but still stay Mitchell and I can't wait to see how it all turns out!  You have a wonderful, strong, and confident daddy to guide you along the way and make the process exciting and meaningful.  "Becoming a man" might be scary at times, but Daddy will be there to show you how to do it!  Cheer up!