We'll Leave The Light On For You

Mitchell is in another funk. He is such a funny kid. He will go weeks without any sort of issue and I will be convinced that he has grown out of something and is becoming so much easier to understand, when BLAM! he wakes up one morning, changed yet again!

This time, he is fearful Mitchell. He's not afraid of the dark exactly, but has a thing for turning lights on everywhere he goes, at all times of the day and night. I will be the first one downstairs in the morning to sneak in a cup of coffee before my little monsters are up, only to be greeted by the entire ground floor ablaze with lights! Knowing that first, I would never have turned that many lights on and second, I always turn all the lights off when I go to bed, I know Mitchell snuck downstairs sometime in the night to illuminate the place.

Last night, I woke up to all the lights on upstairs! That one even woke Matt (and that's not an easy thing to do!) Matt got up around 3am grumbling about being blinded in his sleep, only to find Mitchell wandering the hallway, making sure all the lights were on!

Even during the daylight, he prefers the lights all on. We have many unused rooms in our house that I check multiple times a day and sure enough, lights are all on.

Strangely, this funk of his follows right on the heals of his last one: turning all the lights off! I kept getting left in darkness in the basement if I tried to play down there. The boys assured me "this is how we like to play down here!" I would be cooking dinner in the kitchen and Mitchell would walk in, turning all the lights off for me with no explanation as to why the dark is better for cooking in. All movies needed to be watched in as much darkness as possible.

I just can't keep up with this guy! Mitchell being who he is, it is difficult to get a real reason from him as to why he currently needs all the lights on, even in the middle of the night when his eyes should be closed anyways. He will mumble something about hearing a monster or how he thinks our house might have ghosts in it. As his thoughts on this monster and ghost are not very organized or well-described though, I suspect he is just repeating to me some idea Ben has inadvertently put in his head in his effort to sniff out the root of the problem.

Whatever his reasons, I feel I have been patient and understanding enough and it is time to get over this. I am tired of him being afraid for no reason. Fear of this sort is not something I coddle my boys for. I will not let him sleep in my bed all night and I will not let him leave all the lights on. I will need to find some way to keep him from wandering the house all night, scared and wasting electricity. My boy was not created to be fearful.

My plan is to cut out all his favorite books and movies. Both my boys love spooky things: monsters, ghosts, and all manner of make-believe scariness. I have always been OK with this sort of thing because we have always been diligent about talking about the make-believe nature of it all. I have no problem with my boys pretending skeletons can walk and talk, or pretending Gabe the green monster lives and drools under their bed, or pretending a ghost lives on the third floor. That's just good fun!

Perhaps I have over-estimated Mitchell's ability to draw a solid line between make-believe and reality though. We will not be reading any of his favorite silly monster books for a while or watching any of his top faves as far as movies and shows go. We are back to PBS cartoons: Clifford, Dinosaur Train, Super Why... good shows (in my opinion) but certainly not the level of entertainment then have grown accustomed to.

Let's see if we can just "forget" about monsters for a while and see if that doesn't keep the lights off at 3am...

Sneaky Sneaky

If I had to pick which one of my boys is the sneakiest, you can rest assured that Ben would not be the first to come to mind. I wouldn't actually call any of them "sneaky," but Mitchell does enjoy attempting to jump out and scare me (and has actually succeeded a time or two - remember my hair-drying story?)

So I was fairly surprised the other day when Ben brought up the subject of my squeaky step. This is how the conversation went down:

Ben: Hey mom, did you know we have one squeaky step on the stairs?

Me: Yes, but I didn't realize you did.

Ben: Oh yeah, I know exactly which step it is because when I'm sneaking around, I know to step over that step. It is so squeaky! If I step on it, you would know I was coming in an instant!

Me: Why are you sneaking around?

Ben: Oh you know, sometimes I just need to get around without anyone knowing where I am.

Me: Really?

Ben: Sure! I'm getting pretty sneaky, you know...

Hmm... I had better step up my game a bit here or I am going to have two boys jumping out at me from around corners, under tables, behind couches, and, apparently, down well-navigated stairs too!

Cardboard Cut-Outs and Life-Sized Dolls

Have you ever been startled or downright frightened by someone not doing anything scary but simply sitting or standing in a place you least expected them?

When I was a kid, my grandparents had a room for us all to play in. It was a great room, but to get there, you had to race through a dark and spooky part of the house, then up equally dark and spooky stairs before you could turn the light on. Once we got to the top of the stairs and were in the room, we'd then turn the light on, and for a little while, jump right out of our pants. Someone had placed a life-sized cardboard man right at the top! Even after a few times and we knew he was there, he still scared us into giggles!

Matt and I had a similar experience this last week while looking at houses. We were wandering around someone's home with our realtor, pleased with everything and feeling quite happy and comfortable picturing our own family within its walls. We were just beginning our inspection of the second floor and peaking into the first bedroom when Matt yelled, jumped backwards, and swore all at once! I was only a second behind him and mimicked the exact same reaction when I caught up with him!

There was a life-sized doll sitting in a chair, facing the door, just staring at us! She had a dazed, spaced-out look to be sure, but to the unsuspecting visitor, she looked real all right! I can't help but think that family set her up like that on purpose to spice up the house-hunting process a bit.

The fact that the realtor was in the hallway quietly chuckling rather than rushing to our aid betrayed the fact that he was already aware of this doll but gave us no warning.

Once our pulses slowed a bit, we were able to resume our tour of the house, but were a bit more cautious entering rooms from then on. We are thinking of telling the owners we would love to have their house, but only if the scary she-doll stays.

Jail Break

Now that I have had a day or two to recover, I can see a bit of humor in a recent unfunny situation: Jack escaped and made a run for it.

Apparently, he does not get enough time to play at the park. Perhaps he wanted to make some more friends. Maybe he just wanted to scare us out of our pants. Whatever the case, Jack made the trip from backyard, across the street, and into the park all on his own little 1-year-old know how - I said he crossed the street!!!

I promise I was watching him (except for those two minutes I had to use the facilities) but he is smarter and more aware than I give him credit for! He discovered an unlocked gate, opened it, and knew exactly where he was and how to get to where he wanted to go.

Little stinker. I really was in a panic, dashing all over the yard, garage, house, and finally, with a feeling of pure dread, out front in the "danger zone," which is anywhere outside my front door for little Jack, until I saw him happily playing across the street at the park.

Rest assured, my doors and gates are all locked securely now and double checked constantly just in case he discovers (which I'm sure he soon will) how to actually unlock them. No mother-of-the-year awards for me this year!

The Dungeon

We have a dungeon.  It is the dark, cold, scary place in which I store a few boxes and also make dozens of trips a week to do laundry.  My washer and dryer are a little old, so they take constant hand-holding, which makes a lot of extra trips down to the dungeon.

Have I mentioned the boys love it down there?  I have to sneak down there to move the laundry along in order to not bring them with me and loose them in the dark, shadowy, spider web-infested depths that run the length of my house.

I'm not sure why, but my boys have wild imaginations and no fear, it seems.  They are not afraid of scary things some kids fear such as ghosts or monsters or skeletons or dark basements.  

Today, while their imaginations were still running in high gear after story time with Dad, they got to talking about our dungeon.  Matt suggested they sleep down there from now on, and they were half in horror, half totally excited at the mere idea of it!  

Ben:  There are huge spiders down there, hiding in the shadows!

Mitchell: Dad, did you know there is a big arm down there that reaches for you and grabs you?

B: Dad!  There are spiky worms down there!  They are small but covered in spikes as sharp as knives!

M: And there are Keeves that suck you in with their legs and eyes and suck you down in!

B: And there are not-so-nice-sheep!  Don't pet them or you'll get stuck to their wool!

M: Big, scary shadows hide everywhere, Mom!

B: Stay away from the boxes, mom!  If you get too close, they will reach out for you and grab you and suck you inside them!

After this, it started to get a bit... creative.  It no longer made much sense, but it was hilarious.  I had plenty of reasons already to not want to do laundry already.  Now I have a few more.

 I'm not sure where they get all of these scary ideas, but I have a suspicion it comes from a certain "big dude" in the house.  I love that they can come up with these ideas and get imaginative and creative with it without actually being frightened.  What a couple of crazy boys...